Things that may help if you are grieving
Grief is a natural emotional and physical response to loss, which can be caused by many different things, including the death of a loved one.
The grief journey, on the one hand, is an individual journey, for nobody else had the same relationship with your loved one as you did. However, on the other hand, that doesn’t mean that you travel into the future on your own.
Here are a few things that others have found helpful, some of which may be appropriate for you to consider: -
- Be gentle with yourself - Grief is exhausting. Allow yourself to feel whatever it is you feel, but make time for naps, eat nourishing foods, and drink plenty of water.
- Talk to family and friends – keep the memory of your loved one alive by talking about them with people who care for you. Sharing how you feeling with those your trust can help.
- Talk to the person who has died – this is quite normal and can be very comforting, so don’t be embarrassed.
- Write down your feeling – begin a daily journal and record how you’re feeling, document particular memories and record the positives in each new day of which there will be some.
- Join a support Group – For those who loved ones were know to Overgate there’s the What happens Next and Time to Talk Bereavement support groups.
- Counselling – If you feel that you’re struggling it may be valuable to speak to somebody on a one-to-one basis through structured counselling sessions, which for those who loved ones were know to Overgate can be provided by ourselves. For others, we’re able to signpost you to other organisations that can support.
- Take up a hobby - Spend time with an old hobby or take up something new as a valuable diversional activity, enabling you to rest your racing mind and concentrate on other things for a while.
- Look after yourself – If you’re able, get outside every day for some fresh air and exercise. It doesn’t have be a long walk, a few minutes in the garden, a gentle stroll along the canal, or a lap of the local park will be truly beneficial
Supporting someone who is grieving
As family members and friends, we’re generally very good at being there to provide support around the time of a death and up to the funeral. Sadly, many people, like a circus leaving town, move on, falsely assuming that others will remain around to provide ongoing friendship and support.
The following may be helpful to remember.
- Simply being there is a powerful reminder that you care – it could be a phone call, or an invite round for coffee, or a trip to the cinema.
- Listening is very helpful – you don’t have to have answers.
- Encourage them to talk – don’t worry if they cry, it’s quite normal.
- Offer practical help – they may be struggling with simple tasks that they’ve never had to undertake themselves in the past. Offer help, and if you yourself don’t know how, you will know someone who does.
- Watch out for them – if you begin to get concerned that they are struggling, encourage them to reach out for support. It may be wise for them to speak with their doctor, for example, if they’re struggling to sleep.